Foreword: I was once a battered wife. When our son was born, I found the courage to leave. There were no women’s shelters in those days and people didn’t talk about it like they do now. Today I am in a loving relationship and the abuse is a faint memory. Though I have never forgotten it, I have healed.

If you’re in an abusive relationship, seek help. Go to a shelter. That’s what this poem is about.

 

 

hasty judgments struck from

a keyboard of false accusations

 

the melody becomes percussive

pounding frantic rhythms—the tempo of my nightmares

 

no harmony in our duet with bitter notes and

minor chords—no delight in our composition

 

what would happen if we changed our tune

listened alternatively to notes of love’s celebration

 

why not sing instead a nocturne chorus

perhaps a symphony or serenade

 

I’m hiding in an interlude of rhapsody—

legato—may we tune our hearts instead to love songs

 

I can’t stop loving you

lean on me

 

all I have to do is dream

save the last dance for me

 

instead I hear your endless empty promises

combined with sarcasm replacing good intentions

 

you chip away at my feelings of self-worth

while I bolster my courage to run from your abuse

 

bravely I seek a shelter where boldness burns and

builds—I have no more appointments with fear

 

secure in the knowledge there’s a shelter from your

aggressive symphony meant to conquer and control

 

brave now, I’m no longer your terrified, passive audience

slowly I’ll be free to compose my own melody

 

with a chorus of new elements and interludes

meant to press forth to a new-found autonomy

 

as I slow my tempo, rehearse my sonata—a solo voice

who recognizes ecstasy, accompanied now by violins of truth

 

wanting not to be battered, intimidated, or isolated

no longer accepting dissonance—no longer your victim

 

I pray for ease in my life—adagio—returning

slowly to my original pitch and beat awaiting

 

a finale to this mutiny where illumination composes

my decisions now, and in tune, I’ll belt out a new chorus

 

filled with notes of courage, strength and joy

into a new concert hall of my own promises